Well, If My Friend Can’t, I Won’t, Either! @RRBC_Org @RRBC_RWISA @Tweets4RWISA #RRBC #RWISA

Being President of the amazing RRBC & RWISA, I have no shortage of material to blog about daily. If only time would allow me the privilege. But, do know that once I commit my thoughts to this virtual paper, there’s a real lesson that’s about to be delivered.

How many of you can recall being in elementary school and refusing to play at recess because your friend who had been so disrespectful to the teacher, was made to sit out as punishment?

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I remember those kids, but for certain, I wasn’t one of them. If my friends got into trouble for behaving badly, you better believe they were on their own. I wasn’t missing out on hopscotch for any reason!

I have never been a follower. Leadership is in my blood. I came from a place where poor (bad) behavior was never rewarded, and that is the exact same way that I taught the many kids who have come up under my charge over the years. It’s also the way I lead my club of adults. Let me repeat that louder … my club of ADULTS. You see, when poor behavior is rewarded, it sends the message that it’s OK to continue behaving poorly, without having to worry about any consequences.

Once learning that their classmates were troublemakers, or unkind, or even taking part in bullying another child, my daughters would quickly move away from those kids, without Mommy or Daddy having to instruct them to do so. You know the spiel … “I don’t want you hanging around that little girl…”? Nope, not once have I ever had to have that conversation with my kids. They just knew.

Since jumping on social media, what I am seeing more often than I’d like to admit because it’s so embarrassing for the ones involved, is how some adults behave just as the elementary school kids I reference above. {Reference the black and white header photo above}. You notice that they are great followers, sometimes even blindly. But, what is mind-boggling, is how they will almost jump to their deaths to follow their “internet buddies,” committing professional suicide, all because of their “internet buddies'” poor behavior. Some of you are shrugging your shoulders at this because your reputation as a Professional doesn’t mean that much to you, right? Or does it?

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When you choose to not participate in, leave, or quit something because you’re following your “internet buddy” whose poor behavior forced them to go, that is weakness in its finest form. That shows that whatever your “internet buddies” do, you’ll do. It also shows an inability to stand on your own morals and on your own two feet. Lastly, it shows a lack of courage to stand in your own truth, lest your “internet buddy” chooses to stop being your “internet buddy.” (How old are we again?) And, are we really willing to risk it all for someone who exhibits that which we have repeatedly professed to stand against? If the response is YES, I suppose we stood against those ideals up until such time they began to clash with the sudden onset of poor behavior displayed by our “internet buddy.”

How about if your “internet buddy” said they were jumping off a cliff – are you jumping, too? Believe me, they are counting on you to follow close behind and it is comical when some of you do. (Take a lesson from this guy – he’s watched his friend jump and is looking down, shaking his head at the stupidity he’s witnessed).

Man looking over cliff

What about if you learned they failed their college courses and wouldn’t be graduating – are you going to turn down your degree, as well?

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Yes, this is how foolish it looks when you choose to lose or give up something good because of someone else and their poor behavior.

After having served as President of RRBC & RWISA for the past 8 years, there isn’t much that surprises me about some people anymore. At this point, I have seen it all and am able to call “it” before “it” even happens – “it” being the behavior and actions of some.

My daughters are adults now, but I still like to model the behavior I always want to see in them. That’s why you’ll always see me standing in my truths, and always deeply grounded in my Professionalism. And although I love you all dearly, I’m never walking away from, giving up, or leaving a good thing just so you’ll continue being my “internet buddy.” I would be embarrassed for anyone to look at me as being that weak.

I’m no longer a child, therefore, I packed away my childish ways along with the other nonsense from my childhood many, many years ago. Can you say the same, or are you also preparing to follow your “internet buddies” right off the cliff? It won’t be hard to recognize the ones who do.

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16 thoughts on “Well, If My Friend Can’t, I Won’t, Either! @RRBC_Org @RRBC_RWISA @Tweets4RWISA #RRBC #RWISA”

  1. Thanks for your leadership and professionalism, Nonnie. While it is disappointing to see long-standing members depart, it is hard to swallow their reasons which are often blatantly untrue. Meanwhile, RRBC and RWISA are strong and thriving and we celebrate our professional and honourable members!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Dear John… those that leave the roster with reasons that we know are untrue, don’t deserve to reside on our roster. I’m not complaining about their exits at all, as I prefer to be surrounded by trustworthy and decent individuals. Anytime you attempt to assault someone’s character because you don’t like the review they gave your book, you definitely belong anywhere but on RRBC’s & RWISA’s rosters. And anyone who wants to follow them, we wish them all the best.

      Honesty in reviews has always been our policy. No adult tantrums because of reviews, has also, always been our policy.

      Clearly, some are against both of these policies.

      Thanks for chiming in, John!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m never going to say I’ve seen it all because I am still being shocked at some of the behaviors I’ve encountered in 2020/21. And I definitely will not be jumping off a cliff just because somebody ask me to. I have always been one to follow my own compass and wasn’t afraid that I wouldn’t belong in a group. I hope anyone who feels the need to follow will stop and think long and hard and decide if that decision will help or hurt them.

    Thanks for the words of wisdom Nonnie.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Shirley, I’m not losing sleep over any followers or cliffhangers… LOL. Because my life is a life lived in service to others, I’m just proud that RRBC gave them wings to fly. And make no mistake about it, their wings most certainly came by way of RRBC & RWISA. Let’s just hope that one day they’ll use them for the purpose in which they were given to them – to actually build and lift, and not used with some hidden agenda of ugliness.

      Thanks for chiming in, Shirley!

      Liked by 2 people

  3. This is a great reminder, Nonnie. One of the things I did prior to the pandemic (officially one year old today–I REFUSE to wish the pandemic happy birthday) was to go into an inner-city elementary school and read with students who don’t have anyone to read with them at home. I have missed those kids so much, especially since I knew their teacher is incredible. She instills the same leadership skills you discuss here in her students. She’s able to “read” the kids with an uncanny knack and can discern when they’re having a bad day from when they’re having deep problems at home. Most of them just need kindness. She tells them at the end of the day, even when they’ve needed discipline, that “tomorrow is another day.”

    Today I started reading again online with one student. What the program does, after reading with the student for half an hour, is to give the book we share to the student. When I dropped it off at his house, he was so excited to receive his “Fly Guy” books. He lives with his grandmother, who looked to me very young to have a grandchild. He said, “I wish you could come to my school sometime.”

    I hope to, once the pandemic opens. I strive to be the kind of leader the first-grade teacher is. She is teaching the kids to stand for themselves under difficult circumstances at home while also teaching them to read and complete skills they will need as they grow older, but not teaching them to be lemmings or bullies. If they can learn that now, they will be so much better off when they mature and can understand your blog.

    WordPress.com / Gravatar.com credentials can be used.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Wanda,
      That is a great work you’re doing. I still remember my English Teacher, Carol Shepherd. She was the catalyst used to turn on the light for this girl that lived in a ghetto. Wishing you all the best and that you continue helping kids to read.
      Shalom aleichem


  4. Kudos, Nonnie! Serious eye-opening food for thought to those who are on the wrong path and don’t even know it. After reading your post, they should stop and smell the flowers and if some are sour and undermining the sweet smell of the others on the path, there are two choices: either dig-up and dispose of the plant or move to another path.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi, John! What a wonderful response! I agree, but in relation to this post, the onus is on those would-be “followers” who have that childish mentality which I have referenced in the title – “If my friend can’t, then I won’t, either.” It’s all so juvenile and embarrassing.
      But I have always been a proponent of appreciating the knowledge of who is in my circle – yes, I want to know when those around me aren’t who they would like for the world to believe they are. I don’t walk around with blinders and because of that, I do a very good job of seeing people for who they really are. I know which ones contemplate the cliff, and I know which ones will actually jump – even before they get up on the cliff. 😉

      Thanks for chiming in, John!


  5. Leaders are those who forge the path for others to follow. Good leaders lead by example and are willing to give a hand up to those following them. That’s what you’ve done with RRBC and RWISA, Nonnie. You hold your members to a high standard, which gives them room to grow. Speaking for myself, I’m happy to be included in this community. I can’t say with certainty that I’ll ALWAYS be a part of it only because God may have other plans for me at some point, and HE is the one I choose to follow above all others.

    When people stop one activity and move on to another, it isn’t always about following the lemmings off the cliff. Sometimes people are called to a different path. How they choose to switch paths, in that case, would define their character. Do no harm, comes to mind.

    I agree that we’re responsible for our choices and sometimes those choices can lead us down a dark path, particularly if we choose to follow someone else who is going that way. Consider carefully whether you’re choosing what’s right for you, or simply following the bad behavior of someone else. That’s what I get out of this, Nonnie. Thanks for bringing up this subject!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi, Patty! Thank you for your kind words! This post is all about those who give up “blessings” in their life in the name of folks they don’t even really know. Whatever those blessings may be, some are foolish enough to through them out the window, just to keep in step with those tantrum-throwing adults who want the world to believe that they are something they are not – decent and kind. That’s the mind-boggling part of this for me.

      But, I love the way you put that “…how they choose to switch paths defines their character.” You are so right, and in my world, the state of one’s character is everything. One day, we’ll all have to move on for a multitude of reasons, but as I’ve always said, there are some who can always return here and add their names back to the roster. For others, the door is securely bolted. It’s always about the way you handle situations. Burning bridges that you might one day have need to cross back over, is never a smart thing to do.

      Thanks for chiming in, Patty!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Hi,
    Your article hit home for me because I have experienced this, not between internet buddies but between friends. Standing out or standing on your principles will cause you to lose people who you thought were your friends. You stick out.
    We all have to make the choice about what is more important to us, our own integrity or running with the crowd. I have come up against such challenges throughout my entire journey in life so far, and I have been blessed to have the courage to stand up, even if it meant being the lone soldier that stood alone.
    It is never good when we do something just because someone else is doing it. If I had done that, for example, in writing, I would have been published years ago, but I knew I wasn’t ready and I wasn’t willing to follow the crowd, and publish just because everyone else was.
    Thank you for your openness.
    Shalom aleichem

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Pat, good for you for not allowing anyone to coerce you into following them, even when it meant you would have to stand alone in your truth. But, I can’t think of a better place to stand, with or without support, than in your TRUTH! Some don’t even know what that means.

      Thanks for chiming in!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Hi,
    I’m speechless, but I have to say that I’ve seen this kind of behavior not only between internet buddies but in real life. Living in Germany, there was a group of us that got together for Thanksgiving. We always met my girlfriend’s house in Wiesbaden. But one year, she informed us that she and her husband would be celebrating Thanksgiving with her family in the USA. Her girlfriend said no problems and because this person knew how much I cherished Thanksgiving Dinner she invited my husband and I to Thanksgiving at her house. In fact, she insisted and I said yes, you can count on us. We will come. Three weeks before Thanksgiving, my girlfriend changed her mind and informed me that she had changed her mind and would have Thanksgiving Dinner. She told me that I could cancel the other invite and come to her house. I said no I can’t, and told her that I had given the lady my word and would not change it. My other girlfriend who was just as close to me as the other said no problem. Iwill fix Thanksgiving Dinner at my house.


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